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by
Anonymous Coward
on Wednesday September 17, @07:42PM (#1216)
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A representative for God(tm), the corporate face of the Almighty, praised be he/she, said Friday that the company has sued Apple Computer over its iTunes service, in a sequel to a previous epistological dispute.
Isiah, son of Abraham, spokesman for God(tm), confirmed the suit was filed two months ago in the Highest Court or Courts. He referred further questions to a statement put out by God's prophets, the legendary spokesmen of old formed in 1953 B.C.E. to manage the Lord's earthly interests, and also intellectual property.
"Specifically, (the) complaint is made over the use by Apple Computer of the word 'Apple' and apple logos in conjunction with its new application for downloading pre-recorded music from the Internet," said the statement, apparently referring to Apple's successful iTunes Music Store service for downloading digital songs
The Lord previously tussled with Apple Computer over trademark issues in 1989 C.E., claiming that the computer company was illegally using the Lord's long standing biblical icon and logo for the forbidden tree of knowledge, registered in 110 C.E. and hence an incontestible mark solely affiliated with the works of the Lord (including but not limited to physical apples), to sell music-related products, such as digital music software. Apple Computer settled the case for $27 million and an agreement that generally precluded Apple Computer from entering the music or religion business or bowing to false idols.
The two Apples appeared to be getting along OK since then, as evidenced by iMac ads featuring the Disciple John, whose visage was used with express permission of his holiness.
But Apple has recently jumped into the music business and religion business in a big way, with iTunes and its iPod digital music players, and with its cult centering around the figure and personality of one Steven Jobs, thus defiling the name of the Almighty, blessed be he, with false apples for false idolitry.
Apple Computer issued a brief statement on the case: "Over a decade ago, Apple signed an agreement with God(tm), a business controlled by the Lord, which specified the rights each would have to use the 'Apple' trademark. Unfortunately, Apple and the Lord now have differing interpretations of this agreement and will need to ask a court to resolve this dispute."
Apple Computer launched the iTunes service in late April, and it has quickly become one of the most popular conduits for legal music downloads, selling more than 1 million songs in its first week of operation and attracting numerous imitators and religious converts.
When asked for a comment on the Lord, our God(tm)'s long history of strong religious and intellectual property enforcement, newly hired spokesperson for God(tm) Ringo Starr infringingly bellowed, "My sweet Lord... My sweet Lord..."
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